When I was a child in Izmir…
Hello. I'm Sinem. I am the youngest child of a family from İzmir Karşıkaya. I grew up in Izmir with my grandparents, aunts, and cousins. I had the opportunity to experience many of the beauties that a large family can provide for a child at a young age. I had a safe, cheerful, and playful childhood. In my childhood, when my parents went somewhere, they would leave us either to our grandparents. My cousins, whose mothers were working, were often there as well. My mother had neither a trust problem nor any anxiety when handing us over to the elders. Because she was sure that we were safe and loved, she knew that we would be embraced wholeheartedly in that warm environment where we could socialize with our cousins.
My mother was able to easily offer us the “safe environment” I wanted to have when I became a mother years later and during work hours when I had to stay away from my child. Unfortunately, I didn't have a chance as my mother did. Our trusted family elders who could take care of my child were in another city. When you become a mother, especially when you are away from your hometown, you realize how valuable and important a life gift it is to be around the elders in your family. You will understand better what I mean when I give examples from my own motherhood adventure in the following lines…
When you become a “working mother"in Istanbul…
After a good childhood and youth, the day came when I moved to Istanbul, got married, and became a mother. In Istanbul, I was focusing on my career and trying to be a good mother at the same time. When I was away from my child, there was no family elder who could take care of him and I was getting support for childcare on a regular basis. It didn't take long for me to realize that millions of working mothers like me, whose rationale and hard work are at work and heart at home, have the same anxious questions on their minds: “Is the person who looks after my child while I'm at work really trustworthy? Can I be enough for my child while pursuing a career in business life? What does my child eat and drink during the day? What does he hear, what does he learn? Does he/she understand and pronounce his/her mother tongue properly? Does the caregiver play with my child or listen to him? I wonder if our caregiver, whom I cherish so that s/he can be good to my child, show compassion to my child as I do?
Au-pair Sinem
I would like to briefly go back to my years before I became a mother and tell you about a period when I was also involved in the care of other people's children. After graduating from university, like many of my friends around me, I tried Au-pair, which is one of the most convenient ways to gain experience abroad. On this occasion, I went abroad. Au-pair means mother's assistant or caregiver in Turkish. I understood the meaning of this word better while living it rather than applying for it. I had a routine of getting up in the morning to take care of the children's daily chores, drop them off safely to school, and then go to my own language school. It was a difficult task, but I was very lucky that the parents of the family I was staying with did not see me any different from their own children and made me feel like one of the family. Even today, I spent very happy and instructive days with this family, which I see as my second family. In order not to be under their hospitality, I saw the children of the family as if I were looking after my brother or cousin. When I had such an experience, I thought that when I had a child, I would have no problems with the multinational caregivers we took into our home… I thought optimistically: I can empathize with caregivers – because I know that childcare is hard work – and I should be fair to them and be hospitable. So, we can have an experience just like I live in England as an au-pair and become a family. But it didn't turn out the way I thought...
I tried, it didn't work. I tried again, it didn't work again...
If you are a mother who is worried about her child’s development while you are away, and the care s/he receives does not meet your expectations, then you are going through one of the most difficult experiences a mother can go through. Unfortunately, I was one of the mothers who had this difficult experience… Of course, there are also loving and well-equipped caregivers. However, like many mothers, I struggled to find the right caregiver. Here are some of the problems I have experienced: The foreign national caregivers I deal with are inadequate in terms of child education and care, they are only financially oriented and act without thinking about my child, their inappropriate behavior caught on camera when alone with my child, losing their heartfelt embrace of my child at the beginning because of their longing for their own children and their tolerance over time. Even though we found it funny as a family at first that my daughter started to say some Turkish words differently after spending hours with a foreign caregiver, I must admit that this situation turned into a serious problem after a while. All these worrisome experiences made me very sad as a mother. I tried, it didn't work. I tried again, it didn't work again...
Then one day, I found a new solution: Early Education
I know that I am not the only mother who underlines and underlines the lines of parenting books written by experts in order to establish good communication and strong bond with my child and to find the right ways to prevent the negative effects of an unknowingly wrong behavior on my child's future. I'm sure many of us are familiar with many aspects of our child's development. This is why we always read to our children before they go to sleep, even on the days when we come home tired from work.
So, what kind of life should our children lead during the long working hours that we are away from them? How can we let our beloved child, with whom we read and play for a limited time in the evenings during the week, spend a day indifferent and unguided in our absence, filling his time with pursuits that do not benefit him? Of course, we do not want to allow it, but I know that most of the time we mothers are helpless and without a solution. We proceed with widely adopted methods and are content with receiving a care-oriented service. Although we know the importance of the first experiences in early childhood, between the ages of 0-6, in life success, we often cannot find the ideal solution. I have always been one of those who think that the ideal solution should be “a service that includes the right education as well as the right care”. But “that ideal solution” was not around…
Questions, desperation, research, concerns, and ideas chased each other, and then one day I found how the ideal service solution for me could come to life: “Early Education”
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